is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
