"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
