I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
