Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
