Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
it was like eating out sand paper
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
25 Porn Addicts Admit Their Biggest Pet Peeves
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep