I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Randomize
