ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
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The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
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My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?