turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Randomize
