Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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