I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
