how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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