Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
