it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Randomize
