I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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