dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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