I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
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