the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
