what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
don't judge my taste in strippers
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
i think i just lost a toe
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize
