Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
