Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize