O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
