so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Randomize
