I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize