Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize