Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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