I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
