Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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