I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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