There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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