i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I need moral support for this bender
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Randomize
