oh god the rape fog is back!
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Randomize
