Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
