Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
