Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Randomize
