I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
