just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize