The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
