Dual....:-)
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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