She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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