I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
