never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
did i just pee glitter
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
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