I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
no you cant smoke seaweed
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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