I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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