I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
