moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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