At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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