i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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