My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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