do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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