like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
