I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize